There and Back Again: A Grimm Tale
by IrnBruOrDeath
Summary: Is it really a oneway trip through the veil?
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: Once again I own nothing! The majority of this chapter was pretty much lifted straight from the book. As always I'm just borrowing!!!

SUMMARY: Is the veil really just a one-way trip?

**There and Back Again: A Grimm Tale**

_Only one pair was still battling, apparently unaware of the new arrival. Harry saw Sirius duck Bellatrix's red jet of light: he was laughing at her._

_"Come on, you can do better than that!" He yelled, his voice echoing around the cavernous room._

_The second jet of light hit him squarely in the chest._

_The laughter had not quite died from his face, but his eyes widened in shock._

_Harry released Neville, though he was unaware of doing so. He was jumping down the steps again, pulling out his wand, as Dumbledore, too, turned towards the dais._

_It seemed to take Sirius an age to fall: his body curved in a graceful arc as he sank backwards through the ragged veil hanging from the arch._

_Harry saw the mingled look of fear and surprise on his godfather's wasted, once handsome face as he fell through the ancient doorway and disappeared behind the veil, which fluttered for a moment as though in a high wind then fell back into place._

_Harry heard Bellatrix Lestrange's triumphant scream, but knew it meant nothing-Sirius had only just fallen through the archway, he would appear from the other side any second..._

_But Sirius did not reappear._

_"SIRIUS!" Harry yelled. "SIRIUS!"_

_He had reached the floor, his breath coming in searing gasps. Sirius must be just behind the curtain, he, Harry, would pull him back out..._

_But as he reached the ground and sprinted towards the dais, Lupin grabbed Harry around the chest, pulling him back._

_"There's nothing you can do Harry-"_

_"We can still reach him-" Harry struggled hard and viciously, but Lupin would not let go._

_"There's nothing you can do Harry... Nothing... He's Gone." _

_And so it was that Harry Potter's godfather passed from his life. Taken through a portal that not even a wizard as long lived as Dumbledore could remember the purpose for. But as the purpose of the gateway had been forgotten, so too, had the rules binding the travellers who passed through it's ragged veil._

_Perhaps Sirius was not as gone as Harry and the rest of the Wizarding world believed._

_AN:_There the first chapter! A bit of a shorty I know, but I'm still not entirely sure where I'm going with this. There's a germ of an idea rattling about in the back of my head. Either that or I'm coming down with some dreaded lurgy! But as with all ideas, this one needs encouragement and nourishment to grow. And reviews are the food of life so...HIT THAT BUTTON!!!!


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: I don't own them. JK does. And as such she can kill off whoever she chooses. Cow!**_

_**AN: Here you go an update. And it's my own writing too. Finished DH the other day and was all inspired. Still can't believe she killed off Fred. And Lupin. And Snape! She found the slash and the Twincest I tell you! **_

_**Anyway read, review. Puh-leeeeeeease! Bats lashes. Winning smile!**_

**Chapter 1: A Place That Is Else**

[6 months after the ministry incident

All he remembered was pain.

One minute he was laughing with the euphoric fire of finally, FINALLY, doing something. Anything. Daring that nut-bag cousin of his and the shocking emptiness when she more than met the challenge.

After that it had been eternal seconds of freezing agony. Icy blades of fire, flaying him down to his very core. Then velvet darkness. Blessed stillness.

When he next became aware he was somewhere…other. Not the ministry. No curtain, no Deatheaters and definitely no Harry. It took him two days to regain the will to move and discover that not only was he lost, he was trapped.

He couldn't shift out of his animagus form!

Shaky. Frightened. He dragged himself to the mouth of the alley that he'd woken in. He had to get back to his godson.

"Oi! Riker check the mutt!"

Great.

Muggles!

"Tsk! He's in a right state. 'Mon dog! We're no' gonnae hurt ye. C'mere pooch!"

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPPHPHP

"Kadrin McNamara! I can't believe you've still got that mongrel!" Ashley Thomas exclaimed in exasperation as she eyed the dark form under the kitchen table in disgust. If she didn't know any better she'd swear the damn thing rolled its eyes at her.

"He's no' a mongrel!" Her friend retorted from the Kitchen, where she was cooking their dinner. "He's a purebred….something or other."

"Now _there_'s a ringing endorsement." Ashley drawled as she turned to accept the heaped plate the brunette offered. "There's barely room for you in this pokey little flat, never mind that grizzly bear trying to pass itself as a dog… What are you doing?"

"Feeding Grimm." Came the nonchalant reply as a dish of the same curry she had just been served was placed on the floor and a can of Tennants poured into the bowl next to it.

"Feeding G…. Never mind!" Ashley decided to pick her battles as she reached for her tall glass of iced water and ignored what looked remarkably like a sneer coming from the dog. "He's proved himself violent. He's a danger to you and other people."

Brown eyes blinked over the top of another can of Tennants. Kadrin placed her can on the table with exaggerated care. Her freckled face suddenly fierce.

"My dog is not. VIOLENT!"

"He practically _mauled_ your ex, Mark!"

"After the bastard took a swing at me!" Kadrin yelled leaping to her feet. She glared at the blonde before storming to a hook on the wall and snatching the lead before turning back and pointing a finger at Ashley. "When it comes to a choice between my big, admittedly strange, dog and some abusive tit with a mummy complex. Then I'll choose ma dog!" the aforementioned beast had abandoned its meal and followed it's mistress as she stormed to the door. "Ah'm takin' Grimm for his walk. Lock the door wi' yer spare key as ye leave!"

"Kadrin wait!"

_**SLAM**_

"sigh I didn't mean it like that."

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPH

Kadrin muttered under her breath as she thundered down the street. In the back of her mind a small voice whispered that she was overreacting, but the thing with Mark was still too fresh for her to deal with any mention of it calmly. Her black eye had only just faded away and the fear and pain was still too fresh in her memory. She knew Ashley was just trying to look out for her in her own snooty English way.

She was so preoccupied with her thoughts that she didn't notice Grimm's ears perking up as they neared the alley where her brother had found him. Nor did she hear the strange whispers coming from within. But Grimm heard them. And knew them for what they were.

A way home!

If Ashley had turned the corner a moment earlier in her search for her friend she would have been witness to what happened next. She would have seen 5'2" of brunette trying to pit 130 pounds against 300 pounds of determined West Highland Dogasaurus, and losing. She would have seen the flash of light.

But Ashley didn't turn the corner a moment earlier. And she never glanced into the now empty alley. So she never even noticed the single shoe spinning in the grime there. The only sign that anyone had been there.


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: Not mine. Yadda, yadda, yadda._

_AN: Here it is peeps. Chapter the second just for you. Home again for Sirius and a whole new world for Kadrin. Thanks to Snowfur and barmy-ol-badger for the reviews. A gold star for both of you._

**Chapter 2: Taking the Lemon drop**

Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts, Senior Mugwump, Order of Merlin: first class, and so on, had experienced many strange things over the years. Some of which he had even been responsible for. But what had and was happening today truly, to paraphrase the Muggles, took the lemon drop!

Not that anyone ever really _**did**_ take the lemon drop. Never mind who he offered them to. Strange really, he thought them the perfect sweet, tart and sweet all at once. A curious turn of phrase when one actually gave it some thought. But he digressed.

The Headmaster popped one of the pre-pondered candies into his mouth as he ruminated over the happenings of the day.

It had started pretty much the same as any other day at this particular time of year. He had just returned the previous day from his annual holiday in Hawaii (Choice waves there) and after a light breakfast had retired to his study to begin preparations for the coming school year.

First on the agenda were the welcome letters for new first year students. He had just removed the 'Naming Scroll' from a drawer in his desk. A rather clever piece of charmed parchment created by Salazar Slytherin and Rowena Ravenclaw, that displayed all the names and locations of children with the necessary talent to attend Hogwarts. When a harried and furiously screeching owl careened through the fortunately open window and crashed onto his desk. Scattering parchment and quills over onto the floor and giving a previously dozing Fawkes a terrible start.

A twitching leg extended from the pile of quivering feathers bearing a scroll showing the official seal of the Ministry of Magic. Upon examination it had proved to be a letter from the Minister himself, Cornelius Fudge requesting Dumbledore's assistance. Apparently the Dark Veil secreted away in the Department of Mysteries had just that morning disgorged two people. Even more alarming was the fact that one of these persons claimed to be Sirius Black. Whom, according to Fudge, the Aurors had already confirmed was still languishing in Azkaban. The other appeared to be a Muggle girl, with only one shoe.

Dumbledore had of course made all haste to the Ministry. To sate his curiosity if nothing else.

After many hours of intense questioning under veritaserum and judicious application of the Sanguis Revelo potion, it was revealed that not was the man indeed one Sirius Black, but far more intriguing, he was Sirius Black from five years hence. A after a couple more hours of intense persuasion Albus had finally convinced Fudge to relinquish the pair into his custody. This led to where they were now. Back in his study: Albus sitting behind his desk watching as Sirius and the young girl, Kadrin she had revealed, argued back and forth.

"Ye great, gormless Ninny hammer!"

"I don't see your problem here Kadrin. I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Wrong! WRONG! Y'don't see what's _**wrong**_ with impersonating someone's pet? Y'don't see what's _**wrong**_ with dragging someone from their world to another, where twats with twigs threaten to have their pet _**monsters **_suck out her soul!? _**Then**_ Methuselah the Wonder Magician here, offers to RAPE MY MIND by making me forget 'these distressing circumstances' there's nothing wrong with that, is there?"

"It wasn't an impersonation. I AM Grimm! And I was a bloody good dog, I saw off that wanker Mike didn't I?"

"Mark! And yes you were a great dog. It's just a shame ye make such a shitty human being!" And with that she reached down, removed her lone shoe, and lobbed it at Sirius' head.

"Albus decided that the appearance of physical attacks was his cue to intervene "If you would…"

"OhmiGOD!" Kadrin exclaimed eyes wide and pointing a finger at Sirius, who was rubbing his now bruised forehead. "I got changed with you in the room. Naked nudity with you watching!"

Sirius leered and growled. "And what a show it was! And I luh-ove that beauty spot on your…"

"_**SHUT UP!!!**_"

**CRASH**

The room plunged into silence as every item on the wall behind Kadrin was flung across the room at Sirius, who threw himself to the floor. A shaky Kadrin fell into one of the chairs in front of Dumbledore's desk.

"That wasn't….I didn't….no." she whispered.

A pale Sirius peeled himself from the floor into the chair next to her

"That…but you're not a…a…"

"Witch!" Albus decided at least one statement needed finishing. "The Sanguis Revelo did identify Miss McNamara as a Muggleborn. I believe that her trip through the veil altered Miss McNamara so she could better survive in this reality"

"What the fuck?" Kadrin mumbled, wiping a hand over her face. "What _**the **_fuck?"

"Which leads me to my plan!" Dumbledore twinkled merrily.

_AN2: MWA-HA! A cliffy! So what IS Dumbledore's plan? Well unless you review I'm not telling! So hit that button!!!!_


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: ownership? Don't have any!_

_AN: Here's the plan. (As if I'd really make you wait for it!)It's a Dumbledore plan, so beware the freakiness!_

**Chapter 3: A Canning Plun**

"A plan?" Kadrin asked.

"Yeas." Dumbledore smiled gently at the still shaky looking girl.

"You have a plan."

"Indeed."

"A plan involving me?"

"And Sirius."

"A plan involving me. And Sirius who is supposed to be in prison. Who IS in prison, but is here at the same time. I mean the present Sirius is here and the Sirius of the past is in prison. Or is it the other way around? My head hurts!"

"It's best not to over think some things dear girl. Lemon drop?"

"Um… Yes thank-you." Kadrin accepted the sweet and jumped in her seat as Dumbledore cried "Yes! Success!" and did a small victory lap around his desk. She blinked rapidly as the old man flopped back down in his chair.

"And the plan is?" Sirius spoke up, manfully ignoring the stranger than usual behaviour of the Professor.

"Well. As you may or may not be aware Sirius, Harry will be starting his first year of study here at Hogwarts in August." Albus beamed at Kadrin who was rolling her lemon drop against the back of her teeth as she listened.

"Harry, his godson?" Kadrin queried.

_**(Veritaserum Questioning can reveal a LOT of information if the questions are not worded correctly. The potion compels whoever has taken it to tell all the truth regarding a particular question. When the Aurors had asked Kadrin if she had ever done anything that could be considered illegal she had listed everything. From parking on double yellow lines, to the time when she was three and stood in the fruit section of Tesco eating the grapes off the shelf.)**_

"Yes. And after Sirius' account of what will/has happened over the years, I believe it would behove us to have people we trust within the student body to lend him their protection. Say, a student with the spell knowledge of an adult and an impassioned young lady displaying the first signs of a formidable magic talent."

"You're talking about Kadrin and I." Sirius exclaimed incredulous.

"Nae offence old man." Kadrin interjected. "But neither of us exactly looks like school kids. An' one of us bears an uncanny resemblance to a convicted mass murderer."

"I _**didn't **_kill anyone!"

"I said ye were convicted, no' guilty!" Kadrin replied before remembering she was upset with Gr…Sirius. "Fanny!"

"I have taken that into consideration." Dumbledore continued. "There is a potion used in wizarding adoptions that infuses the child with the traits of the parent or parents. Essentially making them the actual child of the wizard and/or witch on a genetic level. I have a wizard in mind who could act as the donor for this potion allowing the two of you to travel unnoticed through the Wizarding World. Also, there is the Reguvin charm. Which can be used to magically reduce you're ages so you will be the same ages as the rest of the students." He beamed at the gawping pair. They were impressed, he could tell.

"Are you off yer fucking NUT?" Kadrin cried. " I'm no' doin' this I'm goin' hame!"

"I'm afraid that's quite impossible, irrespective of whether you agree to the plan or not." Albus replied sternly. It was most vexing that everyone seemed to think he was mentally imbalanced.

"WHY?!"

"I'm afraid that any trip through the veil is strictly one way. The only reason Sirius was ever able ton return was because of his ability to change his form. If you try, you will most certainly die."

Kadrin slumped defeated into her chair, eyes filling with tears. Sirius paled, finally realising what exactly he'd done to the person who had spent a year nursing him back to health in the other world and given him a home. He hung his head; it seemed he was doomed to fail everyone who was dear to him. First James and Lily, then Harry with his impetuous behaviour at the Ministry, and now Kadrin would never see her home or family again because of what he had done.

"What's in it for us?" he croaked

"Pardon?" Albus asked peering over his glasses.

"If we do this, what do we get out of it?" He said more firmly, lifting his eyes to meet the Headmaster's.

"Well. A second chance for you Sirius in many ways. Not the least of which to get to now your godson better. And Miss McNamara will get a magical education from one of the finest schools of witchcraft and wizardry in the world, if I do say so myself."

For a while the only sounds n the room were the ticking of a clock, Fawkes' light snoring, and Kadrin grinding her teeth as the two thought about the choice before them.

"I'll do it." Kadrin finally declared. "But what if we do anything that alters the time line? What if we do something that prevents Harry from defeating Whatsizname…The Dark Loon?"

"I had thought of that." Albus twinkled at the irreverent reference to one of the most feared wizards in history. "I can alter your memories. NOT" He raised a hand to fend off Kadrin's protests. "Remove them. There would merely no longer be any emotional connection for you. In a sense, it would be like something you read in a book. You would still have access to all the knowledge you have gained but you would not be prevented from having a proper childhood."

There was another long pause as the two mulled over this new piece of information. They looked at each other briefly before turning to the Headmaster.

"Done." They both proclaimed.

"Excellent. I have already taken the liberty of informing the aforementioned donor and they should be arriving shortly with the potion."

"Who _**is **_the donor?" Sirius asked as the door opened behind them.

"You wished to see me, Headmaster?"

_**"SNAPE?!!!"**_

_AN2; there you have it folks. Sirius Black and Severus Snape are soon to be related! Let the wackiness commence!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: I'm getting fed up with this. This is not mine, its JKs._

_AN: Thanks for the reviews folks. Here's chapter 4 for you. I'm on a roll, don't take it for granted._

**Chapter 4: A Plan within a Plan within a Betrayal**

B being reverted back to your youth sounded cool in theory, but Sirius wasn't sure he was too thrilled with the process. Even his hair ached! Shrinking down from 6' 1" of adult to 11 year old height was NOT fun. Never mind the trauma of discovering that when all this was over he would be calling SNIVELLUS dad!

After the 24 hours it had taken Dumbledore to convince the two men that this was the best thing to do. Sirius wasn't convinced by the argument that once his memories were altered he wouldn't care anymore but Dumbledore had won out in the end. It had been explained that the Reguven charm would be first, then the potion, then their memories. Even Snape was getting that one, so that he wouldn't treat the altered Sirius as he would the original.

This was how an 11 year old Sirius and Kadrin now found themselves in the school infirmary, gazing at the two steaming goblets of a vicious red potion. They would sleep while the potion worked to change their bodies and it was then that Dumbledore would perform the memory charm. Snape was lurking in a shadowy corner of the room glaring at everyone, while a candy popping Headmaster regarded the pair with a disturbing 'Awww Cute' look in periwinkle blue eyes.

Kadrin suddenly turned to him and raised her goblet in a toast. She waited until Sirius did the same before saying.

"Fuck you!" and threw the potion back gulping it down in one. Sirius grinned at her.

"Fuck you!" and drank his own potion. He leaned back on his bed, waiting for what came next. Was the potion supposed to taste like pumpkin pasties? He yawned hugely s his eyes grew heavy. He blinked lazily as Kadrin's head began to nod. Well, goodbye Sirius black he thought and the last thing he saw before darkness took him was Dumbledore raising his wand.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHHPHPHPHP

Kadrin Eileen Snape blinked the last vestiges of sleep from her eyes. She pulled herself to an upright position and looked around toe room. In the bed across from hers lay the form of her brother. As she looked at him, a hazy image of a shaggy haired blue eyed man seemed to impose himself over Regulus Septimus Snape. She blinked again and har brother was as he had always been.

The same skinny build, pale skin and long nose she herself had. The only marked difference between them, aside from the whole boy/girl thing, was that while she had their father's black eyes Regulus' were gunmetal grey.

Never one to sit idle for long, she swung her legs over and came to her feet. She had a moment of vertigo, a voice screaming at the back of her mind that she wasn't meant to be this height. Wrong! Her body was all wrong!

"Ah. You're awake." And with that the feeling was gone. "I hope you are feeling better children, you gave your father quite the fright." Dumbledore continued, meeting Kadrin's eyes searchingly.

"I'm quite alright uncle." She replied. "I'm just….no, you're not….this isn't me. I'm not a Snape!"

"My dear girl!" Dumbledore twinkled merrily. "When have you ever been anything else? I think you're just a little groggy after you're illness."

"Illness?"

"Yes. You and Regulus have both been suffering from high fever. You've both been delirious for the past three days."

"Delirious? Then, hallucinations?" she asked, wishing her father was here, he always new what was wrong.

"Oh indeed. Regulus spent the better part of yesterday in deep discussion with, I believe, a human sized purple parakeet."

"Oh!" Kadrin murmured casting her eyes to her brother, who was just beginning to stir. That must be it; she was still feeling the after effects of her fever. It had been a dream.

"Where is father?" she asked the headmaster.

"Oh, he'll be along shortly. He's been very worried about you two. I practically had to hex him back to his quarters for some rest." He chuckled as he pulled a bag of lemon drops from the pocket of his chartreuse and violet robes. "Lemon drop?"

"Yes, thank you uncle." Father and her brother often mocked her for her liking of the candies. Father muttering under his breath about the corrupting influence of interfering old men.

"While I'm here. I would like to ask a favour of you children."

"Hasn't the Snape family done enough favours, old man?" Regulus snarled as he dragged himself from the bed. "Our father's debts are his own!"

"Regulus!" Kadrin admonished her brother, sending him the Snape patented glare of doom number two. He was always grumpy first thing in the morning.

"My dear boy. "Albus twinkled relentlessly. "It s not any hardship. Its just that when Hagrid takes you for your school things in an couple of days, there will be a young man accompanying you. And since it will be his first time in the wizarding world, I was hoping you would both look out for him."

"You want us running after some Mud blood?" Regulus cried.

2watch your language young man!" a steely look crept into the professor's eyes. "Harry's parents were two of the finest Hogwarts has ever seen!"

"Harry?" Kadrin interrupted. "Harry Potter? Father knows about this?"

"Yes. He said –what was it now? Ah yes- that he had 'no objections to his children babysitting the potter brat, as long as he doesn't pull them down to his level.' Or words to that effect."

Kadrin and Regulus had to concede that it did sound like something their father would say. They looked at each other, communicating in that strange way twins often had. Regulus gave a slight that she was to act as spokesperson in this instance.

"Very well uncle." She said. "We'll keep the boy out of trouble as much as we can. We make no promises to befriend the brat however. Now if you will excuse us, we were off to see father."

And with that the pair left the infirmary with familiar sweeping strides. Neither looked back to see the sudden slump of Dumbledore's shoulders as the twinkle drained from his eyes.

"I am sorry children. But I do what I must for the greater good!"

_AN2: sneaky Dumbledore! Just thought I'd add that if Sirius and Kadrin seem to have had a complete personality change, that's because they both now have the memories of being raised by everyone's favourite Potions Master. What do you all think? Hit that review button!!_


	6. Chapter 6

_AN: There has been some concern about Sirius/Regulus' behaviour in the last chapter. Fear not my chickadees, for I have not turned the erstwhile hero into a baddy. It's like Kadrin said, he's just grumpy and snape-ish when he gets up in the morning. Though how nice of a guy he can be when his idea of a practical joke is to set a werewolf on someone is a mystery to me! Things are going to kind of bounce about a bit, with more snapshots of the years up until about fifth year. If anyone has any requests of parts of the books that they'd like to see with a Snape Twin twist hit that review button and let me know._

_Now, on with the story._

**Chapter 5: Harry Potter meets two Snapes in the Grass**

Harry had been quite excited when Hagrid had told him they were going to get his school things. Who wouldn't be, when they were told they were going to part of the magical world to buy supplies for their magic school. MAGIC school. _**MAGIC**_!

He was becoming less so however as he came face to face with the entrance to this magic world. The Leaky Cauldron. A pub! A shabby pub, if one was being kind. A grotty pub, if one was being honest.

"This way 'arry." Hagrid boomed jovially. "Jus' 'ave ter pick up the pr'fessors kids an' we can get yer stuff."

"The professor's kids?" Harry asked.

"Oh, didn't I tell yer? Pr'fessor Snape's two 're startin' firs' year as well, so they're comin' with us." And this apparently being all Harry needed to know Hagrid proceeded to push through the door. Harry blinked in the gloom as he followed. It really didn't look any better inside than out.

He scampered after Hagrid who was making his way across the room in huge strides. He peered round his new friend to look curiously at the two people at the table they were approaching.

They were both tall and skinny with pale skin, black hair and long noses. So alike they could only be twins. The boy wore baggy and fashionably torn jeans with a blue shirt advertising something called "weird Sisters". His short hair was spiked up and he wore a large studded collar round his neck. The girl was all in black. Jeans, boots and t-shirt. She wore her hair long, scraped back into a braid that hung over one shoulder. Glittery red letters on her shirt claiming 'I heart Darth Vader'. They were sitting at the table with a paper bag between them. Alternating taking a grape from within, and then throwing it across the table into the other's mouth.

They turned simultaneously when Hagrid and Harry reached the table identical smirks appeared as Harry was subjected to a thorough appraisal from black and dark grey eyes. Not a little bit unnerving.

"Righ' then!" Hagrid boomed once more. "Kadrin an' Regulus Snape. This here is 'arry [potter. 'E's comin' to Hogwarts this year as well."

"We were aware." The girl drawled. "Shall we get started on the shopping Mister Hagrid?"

"Righ' you are Kadrin follow me 'arry. You stick wi' these two, they're an all righ' pair."

"I think we've just been damned with faint praised little sister." The boy snarked as the pair stood. Both of them taller than Harry thought any 11/12 year old had the right to be.

"In deed big brother. Harry looks a bit nervous though doesn't he?"

"Don't worry kid." Regulus growled. "We've had all our shots!

Harry wasn't sure how to respond to this so he contented himself with trying to take in as much as he could of this new world. The street he now found himself in was bustling with all sorts of strange looking people. Some Harry wasn't even sure were completely human. He realised suddenly that he was drawing attention again. Men and women like paused to stare and then turning to whisper to their friends.

"It is him!"£

"The-boy-who-lived!"

Harry moved closer to Hagrid, trying to hide behind the half-giant's bulk. Kadrin and Regulus stepped forward to walk alongside Harry.

"What's this?" Regulus said in mock astonishment. "The boy-who-is-overly-hyphenated not enjoying the adulation of those who surround him?"

"Not quite what we expected, is it Lus?" Kadrin returned.

"No indeed Rin. Perhaps we should do our companion a favour and draw some attention away?"

"Why not?" Kadrin smirked at her brother before turning to face Harry. "Watch us work, scruffy."

And with that the pair strode ahead. The long black coats they had donned on leaving the warmth of the pub billowing behind them impressively. They seemed to have grown taller and somehow, darker. Something dangerous swimming behind eyes that a moment before had been full of mischief.

"Snapes!" was heard muttered like a curse from various sources and Harry was relieved to find the attention now taken from him and focused on the twins. Though puzzled by the response.

"'ere we are!" Hagrid announced eventually. "Gringotts!"

"The bank." Regulus explained to Harry not unkindly.

After facing down the surly goblins inside. An experience Harry was in no rush to repeat. The twins matching them glare for glare. They were led to a cart, like one Harry had seen when he'd done a project on old fashioned mining at school.

The four, plus goblin, clambered inside. Hagrid and Griphook to the front and the three children in the back. Harry sandwiched between the twins. They both grinned at him with a look that could only be described as a strange kind of mayhem in their eyes.

"Fasten your seatbelts everybody, its gonna be a BUMPY ride!" Regulus announced grinning madly.

"Everybody put your hands in the air!" Kadrin cried, suiting action to word as the cart shot forward with surprising speed. And Harry Potter and his two maybe-friends laughed, hooted and hollered all the way to the vaults.

_AN2: So what do you think? The sorting comes next but I'm not sure what to do after that. Plus I've got re-sits soon so updates will probably be more sporadic._


	7. Chapter 7

AN: MWA-HA! Tis I! And with a new chapter too. Here's the sorting Kiddie's. Read, review all that jazz!

**Chapter 6: Getting It Sorted**

Kadrin and Regulus had been sitting in the little room off of the great Hall for what felt like hours now. Kadrin sat with her back against the wall, long legs crossed at the ankles. A book hung neglected from pale fingers as she watched her brother pace. He'd been agitated since they had been to Diagon Ally. Before their Father had seen Regulus' new Sid Vicious look.

THAT had been a conversation and a half! Neither of the Snape men were known for their sweet temperament. But, seeing as how Regulus hadn't had to change tit too much to satisfy his father –keeping the hair, but no jewellery or make-up during school hours- it didn't explain why he was so worked up. And he wasn't talking either, just wearing a hole in the flagstones.

"What's wrong?" She couldn't take his silence anymore. It just wasn't Regulus' natural state.

"Dunno." Regulus replied, finally coming to a halt and flopping down into a sprawl next to his sister. "Feel funny."

"Funny how?"

"Dunno! It's just…Harry!"

"Harry? What about Potter?"

"Dunno. Christ I sound like a Hufflepuff!" He growled, pinching his nose in frustration. "He-I-He needs looking after! He shouldn't be left with those….Muggles!"

"This was new. Regulus wasn't one to take such an intense liking to people. Especially someone whose name practically sent their father into an apoplectic fit.

But further questioning would have to wait as McGonagall chose that moment to lead the rest of the first years into the room. The twins rose to their feet as the others filed in filling the room. Easily looking over the heads of their peers they tuned out the Professor's stern voice as they scanned the faces.

There was the pale blonde Kadrin had befriended in Madame Malkin's. If you could call trying to out-snark and out-sneer each other as an attempt at friendship. Draco Malfoy. At the moment he was scowling at Harry who was standing as far away as possible in the small room, next to a gangly redhead with a dirty smudge on his nose. A Weasley unless Kadrin's eyes were deceiving her. They both began to push their way through the crowd. Arriving just behind the two boys who were talking in quiet voices.

"There's not a witch or wizard who went bad who was not in Slytherin!" The redhead declared.

"Hm. Yes. And everyone of them bears the mark of Cain so their inherent evil is there for all to see! Idiot Boy!" Kadrin sneered as the pair whipped round.

"I think you'll find Mr. Weasley." Regulus added." that everyone of us has the same capacity for good or evil regardless of what house they are placed in."

Kadrin sniffed disdainfully, her nostrils flaring dramatically. "Ignorant bigotry is endemic to all Pureblood families. Even the sainted Weasleys. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm leaving before my brains disintegrate completely by association." And with that she swept away and was soon in discussion with Draco.

"Might've known a SNAPE would be all palls with that slimy sod!" the boy grumbled as his ears turned red to match his hair.

"That Snape's my sister Weasley." Regulus snarled menacingly. "Watch your tone when you speak of her!" He was prevented from continuing by a tap on the shoulder. He turned and came face to face with McGonagall.

"The Sorting Ceremony is about to begin."

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

The students all stared at the dirty, patched hat that McGonagall placed on the stool. A rip near the base opened wide like a mouth and it began to sing.

'_Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,_

_But don't judge by what you see,_

_I'll eat myself if you can find_

_A smarter hat then me._

_You can keep your bowlers black,_

_Your top hats sleek and tall,_

_For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat_

_And I can cap them all._

_There's nothing hidden in your head_

_The Sorting Hat can't see,_

_So try me on and I will tell you_

_Where you ought to be._

_You might belong in Gryffindor,_

_Where dwell the brave at heart, _

_Their daring, nerve and chivalry_

_Set Gryffindors apart;_

_You might belong in Hufflepuff,_

_Where they are just and loyal,_

_Those patient Hufflepuffs are true_

_And unafraid of toil;_

_Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,_

_If you've a ready mind,_

_Where those of wit and learning,_

_Will always find their kind;_

_Or perhaps in Slytherin_

_You'll make your real friends,_

_Those cunning folk use any means_

_To achieve their ends._

_So put me on! Don't be afraid!_

_And don't get in a flap!_

_You're in safe hands (though I have none)_

_For I'm a thinking cap!'_

"When I call your name," McGonagall declared "you will put on the hat and sit on the stool to be sorted."

Harry watched as the others were sorted. Malfoy went to Slytherin practically without the hat touching his head. Hermione and Neville –He of the escapologist toad- were both to Gryffindor, and then…

"Potter, Harry!"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Snape, Kadrin!"

"SLYTHERIN!"

Harry saw the dark, hook nosed wizard next to Professor Quirrel smirk in approval as Kadrin took her place next to Draco.

"Snape, Regulus!"

_And thus endeth the chapter._

_Kidding!_

"GRYFFINDOR!"

The hall fell silent as Regulus snatched the hat from his head and stared askance at it. McGonagall looked horrified before she controlled her expression and shoo-ed Regulus to his seat.

"My dad's gonna shit Bludgers." The boy muttered as he sat next to Harry pointedly not looking at the head table where the dark wizard looked as if he wanted to take a pair of garden sheers to the offending item.

So what did you think? Huh? HUH? I'm thinking one more scene from first year. Troll or Mirror. Vote by pressing that review button.


	8. Chapter 8

MWA-HA! Tis I. No, I did not fall down a deep, dark hole. I have in fact been rather stuck on where to go next with this story. But lo! Here hippityhops a bunny of the plot variety. And thus a new chapter is born.

A cookie for Barmyolbadger who gave me a vote for the troll incident.

And here it is.

**Chapter 7: Troublesome Trolls**

Several weeks later found Harry settling in at Hogwarts. His classes were all right for the most part except for DADA and Potions. DADA because he always seemed to develop a migraine in that class. Potions. Professor Snape was…intense. The man seemed mortally offended by Harry's friendship with Regulus and that neither boy displayed any aptitude for the subject. He'd been heard more than once muttering about foolhardy Gryffindors ruining his son. Harry was beginning to think that the man would find anything remotely Potter related an offence in general. Up to and including the air Harry breathed.

Still, he decided, best to push all that from his mind and enjoy the Feast.

It was Halloween and the Great Hall was done up to the nines. Jack o' Lanterns floated above the orange and black festooned tables. Their carved faces providing the lighting, and bats flitted from shadow to shadow, sending more than one girl into squealing fits when they swooped down near their heads. Dumbledore viewed the proceedings with a benevolent twinkle from the Head Table. Wearing a hat that reminded Harry of a film the Dursleys had watched once before they figured out it was about magic.

All Harry got was David Bowie in jodhpurs, a maze, and some

Old guy that had a French talking chicken hat for a brain.

Harry pondered the parallel for a moment before being distracted by an elbow planting itself in his ribs. He glared at Regulus who smirked at him before pointing across to the Slytherin table.

"Looks like Puff's got an admirer." The taller boy gloated in his uniquely growly voice. Harry cast his eyes to where Regulus was pointing to see a pug faced girl (Pansy, he thought her name was) force herself onto the bench between the Slytherin Prince and his now constant companion Kadrin.

The darker girl sent a scowl Pansy's way that would have, and had, sent the toughest seventh year scurrying away. Unfortunately Pansy was too busy slobbering over a pained looking Draco to notice.

"What's she going to do?" He asked as Kadrin's posture changed subtlety to what Harry had come to recognise as the Snape-Plotting-Imminent-Doom pose. Patent pending.

"Dunno." Reg returned. "But it should be good. Rin hates that girl." Reg then proceeded to stuff an entire pumpkin pasty into his mouth while watching avidly. Harry turned back to the scene as well, if only to escape the sight of his formerly favourite treat being so abused.

Something in Kadrin's posture must have penetrated the thick fog that Pansy passed as a consciousness. The pale haired girl turned and said something that Kadrin ignored. Black eyes were trained on a quivering chin in apparent morbid curiosity. Pansy spoke again while nervously rubbing at the spot. Kadrin's expression changed to one of someone who saw something they recognised but couldn't quite name. Pansy was becoming increasingly agitated, shifting restlessly under the stare of her house mate.

Kadrin suddenly reared back in her seat. Her eyes went wide in the perfect picture of astonished revulsion.

"What? What is it?" Pansy's sudden shriek pierced the air, reaching Harry on the other side of the Hall. She leapt from her seat. "Oh my God! What's wrong with my FACE?!?" and covering her face with her hands she ran squealing from the Hall.

Kadrin watched the girl run away with a grin on her face that would have put the Grinch to shame.

"I've been wondering about the exact same thing all year." She enunciated in the stunned silence before delicately stabbing a wriggling Chocolate Frog with her fork and blithely decapitating it with her teeth.

_**HPHPHPHPHPHPHP**_

The Feast was drawing to an end. Harry had stuffed himself to bursting and was contentedly sitting with his friends and idly wondering if he'd have to roll back to his dorm.

**SLAM**

"TROLL IN THE DUNGEON!" Quirrel cried as he ran towards the Head Table all flapping robes and flailing arms. "TRO-OH-OLL!!" He stopped. "Thought you ought to know." he gasped before collapsing in a heap on the floor.

_God this Fic's giving me problems! Took me hours just to come up with this and now I don't know where to go with it. **pouts at plot bunny that abuses me so. **So I leave to my loyal reviewers to decide. Should I show what happens with the troll? Or just the aftermath? _

_Press that review button and let me know._


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